Men who had an authoritarian and/or aggressive mother may be neurotic. The mother either did not pay attention to her son at all, was busy with work or engaged in it out of necessity, or was emotionally cold. The boy suffered as a child; he lacked maternal warmth and attention, and he may have been afraid of his mother and or been dominated by her. As a survival mechanism, he tried not to perceive her as a mother at all. The presence of a mother was more of a formality: she did not care about him, as she was always running somewhere, and he rarely saw her.
When such a boy grows up, the object of his desire is a cold, sometimes cruel woman who gives him nothing. He suffers from jealousy and feels defective. And if they have children, he is jealous of them.
He acts like he does not need a loving, caring woman. What if he marries a good girl by mistake or by accident? Then he will trigger situations to receive that negativity he misses like an addiction. Love for him is sheer self-pity.
Every child born in a complex neurotic family absorbs conflicts, betrayal, coldness, and the inability to rejoice. They grow up with a feeling that a) everyone lives this way and b) people are born to suffer.
But this isn’t true! You can live differently, trust me! And life is not as scary as you think: you can be happy without being afraid that something bad is going to happen. Love doesn’t have to be earned. You can be loved for who you are –You!